I read an interesting statement this week in an introduction of a speaker. It said that this speaker and his wife were joined together in marriage without dating. I thought that was quite odd as I would be surprised if it was an arranged marriage where the couple had no interaction until their wedding. But it also brought to mind how saddened I am by the idea that seems so prevalent in conservative Christian circles that “courtship” is somehow more spiritual than dating. If courtship works for a couple, then great. But how is it more spiritual than a couple whose lives are led by the Spirit of God but do not follow some man made model of what the road leading to marriage should look like? We really put God in a box when we say that things have to be done by this or that system to be legitimate. What happened to allowing couples to check their actions against the Word of God instead of a list of dos and don’ts? What happened to allowing God to control their lives instead of man trying to control them? I think as a church we have a wrong focus. Instead of being so concerned that our children only court their future spouses, why not concentrate on teaching them the Word of God so they can live a life of walking in the Spirit as it commands in Galatians 5:16? If they learn to do that, they will be in line with God’s plan no matter what road they take toward marriage.